"Let the others come after us. We welcome the chase. It is healthy for us.
We will never hide from it. Never fear."
- William Struth

It Is Good News Week

Written by: John McCrae
Sunday, 29th November 2015

Not even the most ardent pop trivia fanatic would recognise the names Mick Tinsley, John Stewart, Alan Laud, Ray Honeybull and Leslie Dash, I suspect. Collectively, these five RAF personnel, were members of shortly-lived pop band Hedgehoppers Anonymous. This outfit made only five records, the most famous of which was called 'It's Good News Week', which made it to number 5 in 1965.

This week, normally sycophantic newspapers, television and radio struggled to write copy which would deflect from Celtic's latest European humiliation. A humiliation which saw them eliminated from playing with decent teams for another year, although the management team insist they will do better next time. Just like they said last year! This year, again, they were turfed out the qualifying rounds prior to the Champions League proper commencing. Admittedly, they started well with an aggregate 6-1 victory against Iceland's Stjarnan, before scraping a 1-0 against Qarabag of Azerbaijan over two legs. In the play-off round, Celtic came up against a team that folk had actually heard of, Malmo of Sweden, and were beaten. Put down, as some say they should be collectively, to the Europa League, they have been humiliated, yet again, in Europe by taking only two, yes two, points from a possible fifteen in what is, remember, the second tier European competition. If only Ronnie had played marquee signing Carlton Cole.

Ronnie Delia's varied ramblings about Celtic being too good for European qualifiers and going the rest of the season undefeated simply prove the old adage, usually attributed to Abraham Lincoln, "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than speak and remove all doubt."

Let me take you back to July 2014, when, just before his first competitive match with Iceland's KR Reykjavik, Delia blasted UEFA, claiming 'Celtic are too good to play European qualifiers'. He then went on to state that Celtic were 'victims of a stupid decision'. If his first statement was calculated to get the Celtic fans on his side, it certainly came back to bite him on the bum he had flashed to Norwegian fans, given the team's dreadful campaign that year and indeed, since. That first game saw them scrape a 1-0 victory with a goal scored in the 84th minute. In the same competition, a 6-1 battering by Legia Warsaw showed up the standard of Delia's charges. The stupidity of the Polish club in putting on an unregistered player for the last four minutes of the game saw them punished by UEFA, as Celtic appealed (I was going to write bitched but that would be uncharitable) and UEFA awarded a 3-0 victory to the Parkhead team. His second soundbite was perhaps actionable by the football authorities but then, when were the Parkhead lot ever taken to task by any football authority?

More recently, on September 26th, when a smiling Ronnie appeared on the back page of the Scottish Scum, defending his team's miserable record of only 11 wins from 16 games by trumpeting that Celtic 'can win every game we play, including in Europe, until the end of the season. Now, examine that statement. It's reasonable, given the crap that masquerades as football in the SPFL, to think Celtic might just win in the league, even the Cup competitions, but, if you think through his European claim, by winning, Celtic would progress to, and win, the Europa League with a 100% record. I'm reliably informed that the Celtic Board have given Ronnie crayons to write with, as they don't trust him to have anything sharp. The problem there is that, following the example of his team captain, he may choose to eat them.

Ajax fans took revenge for Celtic fans running riot in Amsterdam twice in recent years. Things got so bad that even the Daily Record saw fit to comment on Scottish fans wearing green and grey, in their usual warped loyalty, chanting IRA songs.


Groups of Ajax fans targeted the drinking dens of Celtic fans. The manager of one, the Hoops Bar in the Gallowgate, was battered senseless and featured in many reports in the mhedia. None saw fit to mention that the bar in question, like so many of that ilk, is a haven for those who idolise the terrorist army that bombed the United Kingdom, killing men, women and children. That particular bar has played host to, among others, Shebeen, a Scottish 'Irish rebel band'.


The musical output of these plastic Paddies can be seen on their website:


Output glorifying the deaths of UK citizens mentioned above.

John Collins had a petulant and undignified go at Rangers, when he claimed Celtic were 'not as bad' as the Ibrox team. No, John, you're not. You're a hundred times worse. And, dare I suggest, running scared. If you have any luck, you will be spared facing us next year, because you and your incompetent boss will have been fired by Slant Eyes. Ronnie can go back to baring his arse (a trait once popular at Parkhead) to Norwegian fans and you can sit at home musing on your 'six pack' and how your bullying players didn't quite work out for you. You are aware that you are despised by the players at Parkhead, don't you? And, if comparisons between the two teams are required, I would remind you that we have won more league titles than you, have agreed to pay the Living Wage and, most importantly, have never had or covered up child abuse at our Club. Is all this lack of class you exhibit stemming from you not signing for us when Souness called because your bigoted family didn't want you to?

Oh, and Rangers hater Thomson's Dundee United remain rooted to the foot of the SPFL and look likely candidates for relegation. A relegation which could see the cash strapped outfit go part time and, hopefully, fold within a few years. Their season has been nothing short of a disaster, with a mere two League wins from sixteen games, resulting in a minus twenty goal difference and eight points, seven adrift from second bottom Motherwell. If only they hadn't chosen to become Celtic's feeder club.

Meantime, Rangers reached a cup final, hammering St Mirren 4-0 in the semi final.

Have a wander round your local second hand record shop tomorrow and support a vital part of the music industry. Browse the shelves and make sure you ask if the store has a copy of any Hedgehoppers Anonymous singles. After all, it's good news week.


by General Schomberg
by Nineteen-SeventyTwo


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